snip snip...snap?

to be very honest, the last week has been a tough one.

I won't use this blog here to state what the CBC is cutting to make up for the $171 million shortfall, but suffice to say, every single employee will be affected to some degree. if you are really curious as to how, feel free to ask me in person.

it's a depressing time to be in broadcasting, and even though I feel like I fell into this opportunity, I can't deny that I've fallen in love with it. And yes, I want to keep pursuing it. And for the past year, it's been breezy...opportunities kept coming, and I was hungry for them all. but now, i'm seeing colleagues who've been at this for much longer than I, worked much harder than I, that will most definitely get their contracts cut. they won't get cut because they're not bringing in good stories, or broke journalistic rules - they'll get cut for the sole reason that there's just not enough cash to sustain everyone.

*sigh*.

so this past week, I feel like my mind is just wandering...I'm one of those people who needs structure and vision to keep moving, and at this point, I haven't quite figured things out yet. all I know for sure is that the future feels very uncertain at the moment.

wormball tutorial on MSN lingo

take a stab at deciphering and/or defining the following: (answers are at the bottom)

haiithur
LG LB
GG
gee
baller
imu
wbu
nat
yeye
ttyn






answers: hi there, little girl little boy ("it's like something people use to say cool or really lame"), good game and gee ("like, when something cool happens"), baller ("cool"), I miss you, what about you, nat ("same as the 'not' in 'not really'), yeah, talk to you never

the little things

my precious $16 orchids from Costco.
Flowers are the best mood picker-uppers - and these ones are just so graceful and elegant...waking up to them always brightens up my morning.

His eye is on the sparrow

I don't know about you, but being unemployed (well, in this case, not having a full time job) or the prospect of being unemployed, always makes me feel worthless to some degree - and the uncertainty materializes in this constant twitch. *twitch, twitch*.

alright, so maybe I'm doing a little dramatizing.

nonetheless, my head (and heart) are going to some pretty dark places...and again, I'm too stubborn to see that God is trying to hold on to me while I'm just running away. It comes down to priorities, I think. And it's this ultra simple Sunday school lesson that all Christians know - put God first and the rest will follow. But dang it...that's one lesson that's tough to apply. I feel the tension - me battling it out with God - my pride and insecurity against His desire to provide and care for me.
I can't say I've overcome anything at this point...but at least I'm fighting to let go, fighting in the hopes that one day I can genuinely surrender my life to God.
And all of this brings me to the following hymn...one I was reminded of just a few days ago. As I started to sing it on my piano, I had a God-pitome...my Father was trying to tell me I was going to be just fine.

Why should I feel discouraged
Why should the shadows come
Why should my heart feel lonely
And long for heaven and home
When Jesus is my portion
A constant friend is He
His eye is on the sparrow
And I know He watches over me
His eye is on the sparrow
And I know He watches me

I sing because I'm happy
I sing because I'm free
His eye is on the sparrow
And I know He watches me
His eye is on the sparrow

the little things

ichiro's chirashi don lunch combo = iris and elaine's epicurean achilles' heel

Ricky Gervais and Elmo

YOU MUST WATCH THIS.

la poésie de dimanche

J’ai perdue mes mots
J’aimerais imprimer tes pensées
Pour moi-même
J’aimerais les traduire
De sorte que je puisse parler

Parce que sans toi
Je n’ai rien a dire

six reasons to love "in bruges"

I'm really not much of a movie reviewer - I'm very bad at writing a synopsis. So the following reasons spark your interest, follow here and read the Pajiba review. Pajiba, unlike me, is awesome at writing a synopsis.

1) colin farrell pretty much IS ray, the impulsive and violent-tempered irish hitman who's looking to be saved
2) it's really a story about growing up - it's about coming to terms about the mistakes that you've made and to let yourself be redeemed
3) bruges is f*ckin gorgeous. man oh man...maybe belgium is worth a trip after all.
4) if you didn't curse like a sailor before, this film will make you curse like a sailor. note the above point.
5) it's witty as heck - the humour is dark and dry...I have no doubt that if I were to ever overhear two European hitmen talking, that it would be exactly like the dialogue in the film
6) ralph fiennes as an extremely angry family man who also happens to be an assassin who lives by a very strict moral code (well...perhaps his morals are a little skewed compared to the average person)

it's a beautiful day in the neighbourhood...

Time: 2:15pm
Hours that I have been at the office: 8
Time I woke up this morning: 4:30am

Oh the joys of the morning show...but hey, at least I get to go home early. Yay!

Epiphany of the day:
You know that saying, "practice makes perfect"? The whole concept behind that saying is slowly but surely being ingrained into my mind. I am predisposed to LAZINESS, and unless I feel deeply passionate about something, I will generally procrastinate.
So...that's my new/old motto.

Also, sometimes you can plan for everything and think you have it all together...but when it comes down to it, there are some lessons that you can only learn through EXPERIENCE. And that's ok. You just gotta keep moving and if you're smart, you'll carry those experiences with fine balance - don't let them weigh you down but don't throw them away either.

Walk on, walk on...