Things that make Iris happy

- light departments of a store (so far Canadian Tire has the best one)
- looking at wallpaper colours/selection
- K-ing with friends
- watching DBSK + Fahrenheit
- chandeliers
- clothes that fit nicely
- seeing varieties of tampons + pads (so many colours)
- being with friends outside of school
- dancing for fun (in a clean room)
- stationary shops
- making gifts
- interactions between me and a "net" friend
- going up to celebrity look alikes and telling them who they look like
- when a crush starts the conversation
- glutinous/starchy things
- sushi
- a clean bedroom
- when i'm doing my homework (don't have to worry about procrastination)
- bubble tea
- receiving gifts
- when somebody comes home with food
- teamwork
- clothing sales
- being at church
- brand new crayons (even though i might not use them)
- hand sanitizer
- dressing up and feeling professional
- the feeling before you have before presenting something to an audience
- good grades
- good grades that beat are higher than a male nerds' grade.

a good hug is like an emotional heimlich
it grabs the mess of resentment, anger, and spite
and shoots it right out of you

a good hug should last a little while
the lingering is what makes it counts
make sure it sticks like velcro

a good hug
is all that I need right now

Christimas reflections

now that I have seen, I am responsible
faith without deeds is dead

my thoughts are far away this Christmas, as I remember the humble birth of our Lord Jesus Christ. Today, as I think about Bethlehem and the circumstances in which Jesus was born: the obedience of Mary, the quiet strength of Joseph, the hope of the wisemen, and the love of God’s grace come down….I cannot help but think about what is quiet, unspoken, and often overlooked by the rose-coloured glasses of my own middle-class Canadiana.

My thoughts begin with the displacement of my own neighbours…those who are without a home in Vancouver on this Christmas Day. The pain of the blistering wind and rain, an empty stomach, and a lack of medical attention…these are the people that Christ came for.

I think of Kandahar, and the Canadian soldiers who are spending Christmas on foreign soil. I think of the Afghani people and what it might be like to live under military occupation. I cannot begin to fathom what those restrictions may be like…and the fear it must instill in the hearts of mothers and fathers who only want what’s best for their children. These are the people that Christ came for.

I think of families who still suffer the consequences of weather-related disasters (although much of what happened thereafter was caused by human hands) of years past: brothers and sisters and friends who have lost their homes due to the tsunami, Hurricane Katrina, and countless other disasters. These are the people that Christ came for.

I think of Burma, and the oppressive military rule that the Burmese people live under every day. No freedom of speech seems like such a foreign concept to the Western world, but it continues to be a life/death struggle for many. To add further chaos, violence is not even Burma’s biggest killer. As I was reading the Tyee this morning, I learned that malaria is in actuality the largest cause of death in the country. The military regime makes it particularly difficult for the Burmese to receive treatment, and many die just from a lack of access to the hospital. These are the people that Christ came for.

These are only fragments of the world…there are millions more stories to be told. For me, they serve as a humbling reminder to what God’s hope is all about…made possible through the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ.

blogless life

I feel like I somehow owe the internet a favour and need to update...although it hasn't been long, a lot has certainly happened.

one friend made: a kind gentleman who kept me company while I was waiting for a cab on main and hastings (lesson learned: cabs do not like the dtes, apparently) - another calendar procured, this time as a gift

two bubble teas: lychee green tea with a hong kong bound friend, which turned out to be a lesson in "how to reject people"; honey aloe with the twin I never had

three overwhelming moments of loneliness andabandonment: inability to sleep on a thursday night (resulting in early morning baking), sitting alone in an empty office at 6pm on the friday before christmas, stranded in a dark alley

four hours spent talking and talking and talking; demonstrating great annoyance to coffee shop patrons, i'm sure

five stores visited: showing infinite see-lainess (yes, it's a WORD) with said twin...we rock at productivity.

six hugs: the lovely ladies at my office almost made me cry...I will miss them dearly.

too many meals to count: first time having dutch pannekoek (the restaurant werves nasi goreng in the morning! mmm), stout and cheddar fondue is always best shared, banana leaf crowdedness.

The saddest part of a broken heart
Isn't the ending so much as the start

reveal to me, o God
through Your eyes, what is unseen by my humanity
may I be slow to speak
and calm in times where all I want to do is shout

pick me up from the shreds of my self-centredness
and restore me
to who You desire me to be

may I be faithful to Your Word
confident in Your power
and hopeful of Your timing

The tragedy starts from the very first spark
Losing your mind for the sake of your heart

Colbie Caillat - Realize

Take time to realize,
That your warmth is crashing down on in
Take time to realize,
That I am on your side
Didn't I, didn't I tell you?

But I can't spell it out for you,
No it's never gonna be that simple
No I cant spell it out for you

If you just realize what I just realized,
Then we'd be perfect for each other and we’ll never find another
If you just realized what I just realized
We'd never have to wonder if we missed out on each other now

Take time to realize
That I'm on your side
Didn't I, didn't I tell you?
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by…didn't I tell you?

It's not always the same,
No it's never the same if you don't feel it too
If you meet me half way
If you would meet me half way, it could be the same for you

fictional poetry (pt.1)

The way you like your coffee
Hold the cream, two teaspoons of sugar please

The time signature you follow as you make each step
Movement between the 4/4 and the 5/4

The grimace on your face
First thing in the morning
As you pinch and squirm into reality

The strangely geometrical shape your hair grows into
After denying the barber of a timely visit

Little things
Minuscule details to a drama-free life
Are all I need to get by

blahblahblah

I know this may come as complete disinterest to most, but my daily transit trip consists of taking the 491 and then the 99 B-Line to my workplace. This is a fairly straightforward process, and terribly mundane to say the least.

Last night, on my way back home, I realized that I had completely forgotten my wallet at work. At this point, I was at Granville and Broadway, and just gotten off the 99 B-Line. I quickly hopped back on the 99 (on the other side) and started muttering things under my breath subsequently…my stupidity had gotten the best of me once again.

The repetitive task of going back and forth on the same bus was a bit too much for my head to bear – it was the act of sheer repetition that drove me crazy. However, I then began to think about how silly a thing this was to get angry with. After all, nothing had been stolen and no harm was done to me…I simply had to use a little more patience than usual.

This “trip” along Broadway prompted me to think how easy it is to complain. I often characterize our culture as one of complacency…but it is equally a culture of complaint. We say much but mean little – we can go on and on about how dysfunctional something is, only to realize later that our concerns are purely self-centred. We’ve become so accustomed to saying how everything is crap that we spend much less time reflecting on how we can change our attitudes while facing different challenges…

All in all, I’m learning to not have to bite my tongue due to my own foolish use of words…

Tristan Prettyman feat. Jason Mraz - Shy That Way

Someone shared this song with me at 1am, and since then, I've listened to it about 20-something times. That's some hot guitar action!

You know you're stunning, you're absolutely stunning, but you're always running...

But I'll catch up to you
The way you keep your distance is keeping my interest, so I'll keep it persistent...

countdown

T-minus 8 days, and I'm out of here!

And that includes Christmas Party this Friday, and a half day off.

waitress - a review

Over the weekend (holy cow…it’s Thursday already), I had the pleasure of watching Waitress…a film that I’ve been wanting to see since April. I went in with a fair bit of expectation: hoping to be touched, moved, and to laugh. I was under the impression that it would be a love story, but in the end, it really wasn’t…which I was glad for. It is absolutely one of the quirkiest films I’ve seen in a while, but beyond some “over-the-topness”, I was genuinely moved. Keri Russell is so stunning and I think she’s just brilliant in this – you just felt for her…who would want a child with a husband who would win in a world competition of ass-holery? She conveys her feelings of being trapped so well – what do you do when you have no means to escape your reality?

One of my favourite quotes from the movie, as Jenna writes in her journal to her unborn child:

Dear Baby,
I hope someday, somebody wants to hold you for 20 minutes straight and that’s all they do. They don’t pull away. They don’t look at your face. They don’t try to kiss you. All they do is wrap you up in their arms and hold on tight without an ounce of selfishness to it.

More thoughts to come….but go rent the movie!

Aimee Mann and Grant-Lee Phillips- You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch

this made my day. merry christmas indeed.

of parks and the need to breathe

I have the habit of taking a walk every day on my lunch hour, simply to get some air and not suffocate in my “cube farm”, affectionately nicknamed by my fellow co-op student. Just as smokers need a cigarette every now and then, I’m addicted to fresh air. Mmm.

One of the difficulties I have found, however, is resisting buying stuff/window shopping while I walk. I don’t work in an area that has lots of park space, and so all I see are shops, restaurants, and cafes when I take my strolls.

I choose not to take my wallet with me when I leave the office, as I know that there won’t be anything that I “need”…but I do get frustrated with the fact that I don’t have anywhere to walk other than streets filled with options to buy and sell. I suppose the landscape of modern day consumerism is hard to avoid, but it leaves me with the question:

Where are all the ad-free public spaces at?

I recently found out that Pigeon Park and Oppenheimer Park will be closing down temporarily, and it just shocks me how spaces where people are able to freely be (without the pressure of enacting “purchasing power”) are increasingly being shut down. In a neighbourhood where parks are some of the few places in which folks can take a break and be with each other, priority should be given by our city to keep them available for use.

Public spaces are a vital part of our democracy – it is where community building happens, where people are allowed to be citizens rather than consumers, and where, for a brief lunch hour, I can forget about Wendy’s “The Baconator” or when CTV airs Grey’s Anatomy…

let it snow

It’s been a pretty strange weekend…I don’t even know what to say. It had some pretty great moments and some pretty terrible ones, and all in all, I don’t know how to feel. Funny how the weather could create such strange social situations (alliteration!)…

One of things I realized though, is that it is so easy to be selfish. It comes so naturally, and it often even feels justifiable…and I have the hardest time getting out of the mindset where “it’s all about me”. I haven’t struggled with myself as much as I have currently, which is a real “accomplishment”. I feel a bit like Jacob did when he wrestled with God…the sheer desperation. I want to wrestle God for more than a name though, and I feel like I’ve fallen knee deep in this fight for meaning, for something genuine.

On a different note, topics to be covered sometime this week:
1) Review of Waitress
2) The magic of Freaks and Geeks
3) Some thoughts on Naomi Klein’s Shock Doctrine
4) Some thoughts on the attention paid to the 2010 mascots