leaving on a jet plane

Two more days until Montreal, and I feel strangely…ambivalent about it all.
On one hand, I am really excited to see friends and walk about town, but another part of me feels like this is almost a farewell of sorts.

For the longest time, I have called Montreal home…but I realized recently how far I’ve come since then.

I’m not sure I can even emotionally handle going back to my old house – especially since I’d have to do it on my own. So much has changed…my family looks different, for example, and my goodness…my sister is no longer a toddler.

I’m scared I might get nostalgia overkill.

Part of this trip is to also connect with who I was – French Canadian roots I’ve so quickly compartamentalized, people I grew up with but lost touch…and who knows, I might even be able to make some old things new and relevant again. Sometimes, I think I need to connect with who I was to know who I want to be.