ode to twenty two

If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy,
I can only conclude that I was not made for here
If the flesh that I fight is at best only light and momentary,
then of course I'll feel nude when to where I'm destined I'm compared

Speak to me in the light of the dawn
Mercy comes with the morning
I will sigh and with all creation groan as I wait for hope to come for me

Am I lost or just less found?
On the straight or on the roundabout of the wrong way?
Is this a soul that stirs in me, is it breaking free, wanting to come alive?
'Cause my comfort would prefer for me to be numb
And avoid the impending birth of who I was born to become

For we, we are not long here
Our time is but a breath, so we better breathe it
And I, I was made to live, I was made to love, I was made to know you
Hope is coming for me
Hope...He's coming

- Brooke Fraser

A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step...except that I find myself being more confused than ever as to where I'm going. the last year has been the most "dramatic"...you know, by soap opera standards. lots of good soapy fare to go around....emotional roller coaster rides and the likes. and I feel like this upcoming year should be one of refocusing (but alas, I should always be refocusing)...a bit like jiggling with the microscopic lens of life a bit. I also find that I'm reaching that age where I'm getting to know who I am too. What I like, what I clearly don't like...what I'm good at, what I'm clearly NOT good at. Understanding who I am at the core of things (i.e a child of God), and learning the hard lesson that pursuing anything else other than my Heavenly Father is simply folly. My hope is that...with age, I realize more and more of my need for God's grace.